Last week I was interviewed on a local radio station.
I’ve done media interviews before so I was ready for most of the questions.
But there was one question I wasn’t expecting. I wasn’t prepared for the DJ (the lovely Melissa) asking me what songs she should play?
Hhmmm, tricky one…if only The Escape Artist had previously given some thought to pop bangerz with a financial independence theme…wait a minute…what’s this?
We had great fun playing songs from the original Now That’s What I Call Financial Independence! Sadly, music copyright law means that we’ve had to remove the songs but you can listen to the interview here:
Melissa even suggested new songs for the latest Now! album. Let’s be honest, I didn’t really need much of an excuse to
flog the dead horse return to the Now FI! series but that gave me all the prompt I needed.
So The Escape Artist is back once again in the guise of a music critic from the NME…armed with earnest prose, tortuous metaphors and psycho-babble to review more classic songs about financial independence.
Stand And Deliver (Adam & The Ants)
Your Money or Your Life is the original bible of the financial independence movement. The title is a reference to Dick Turpin style highwaymen that used to give people the choice of giving up their possessions vs giving up their life.
At gunpoint, most people prioritise their life over possessions and hand over their watches, jewellery, purses etc. So why can’t people see that by getting themselves trapped by their spending in jobs that they hate, they are choosing their possessions over their life?
Imagine (John Lennon)
Here we have John Lennon’s take on a FI utopia.
Imagine that everyone is financially independent. Everyone is free to pursue their creativity or have a lie-in in their jim-jams with their soulmate.
Sceptics will point out that its a lot easier when you’re a former member of The Beatles with royalty income gushing into your bank account from your intellectual property (imagine there’s no possessions!). And they might have a point there.
But perhaps The Escape Artist is also a dreamer. Because I can’t help thinking that the ideas of financial independence are a force for good, for happiness and the environment.
Everyday People (Arrested Development)
As I explained in Financial Independence is for Everyone Part 1 and Part 2, everyone can use the tools, techniques and mindset of financial independence. Its understandable that critics object to FIRE on the grounds that only a small % of the population are likely to retire very early. But they’re missing the point.
That’s because it’s not binary. Everyone can get better with money. Everyone can bring forward their retirement / financial freedom date. Everyone can get out of debt, build an emergency fund and get more choices and more power over their own life.
Gold (Spandau Ballet)
Gold pays no income and creates no wealth. It just sits there as an inert store of value. It’s funny that people buy paper gold to “hedge against Armageddon”: come the end of the world gold funds, derivatives and exchange traded commodities etc will be about as useful as a student demo.
Physical gold makes more sense but still can’t protect you from the fall of capitalism nor zombie apocalypse.
If that’s what you’re worried about, I suggest you tool up with an assault rifle and plenty of ammo. Or even better, do some work on yourself. As Spandau Ballet remind us: its far more powerful to re-wire your brain to a growth mindset.
Make it rain (Fat Joe ft. Lil Wayne)
Here we see Fat Joe falling into the trap of thinking that the only way to attract women is to throw money at them.
The Escape Artist would respectfully point out that Fat Joe has some room for improvement both in his physical fitness and his dress sense. Perhaps he would get more…how shall I put this?…bang for his buck if he raised his Game in those departments?
Fat Joe says he has a slow metabolism but I’m not sure about that. The Escape Artist previously solved the obesity crisis. And natural food (e.g. fruit and vegetables, nuts, fish, olive oil) work out cheaper than processed food.
Better the Devil You Know (Kylie)
Reading between the lines, Kylie’s employer has been taking her for granted. Her contractual hours are 9 -5 pm but in practice she’s regularly expected to put in evening shifts and weekends. If she only actually worked 9-5pm it would be a pretty good gig…but those extra hours are eating up her life.
Fortunately she has a freedom fund that’s enough to allow her to go part-time or take a lower paid job that would feed her soul or maybe even quit mandatory work altogether?
So what’s stopping her? She’s run the numbers but still she worries. Perhaps there’s an error in her spreadsheet?
Live Forever (Oasis)
One thing that worries Kylie is longevity risk…the risk that she outlives her portfolio.
Some of the Safe Withdrawal Rate (SWR) studies model 30 year retirement periods. But if you retire in your 40s…you could have another 40, 50, 60 years to go! Surely you are twice as likely to run out of money over 60 years than you are over 30 years?
Errr no, it doesn’t work like that. Sequence of returns risk is concentrated in the early years. And, to be honest, once you understand the 25x rule of thumb most further analysis of the SWR is a form of displacement activity: like worry beads but with spreadsheets.
Car Wash (Rose Royce)
No one ever eliminated risk with a spreadsheet (although many have tried).
But there is a way to CRUSH sequence of returns risk. And that’s by getting a fun / flexible / part time job that you enjoy or starting a lifestyle business.
Binary thinking is the curse of the internet. The idea that you are gonna retire in your 30s or 40s or 50s and never earn another penny strikes me as unlikely.
Since reaching FI, I’ve done different voluntary and low paid jobs including nature conservancy, van driving and being a barman (as well as my financial coaching). If you can get over
your ego the whole status thing, there are plenty of ways to occupy yourself whilst earning some money on the side.
Fuck The Police (NWA)
Earning after financial independence?!? What would The Internet Retirement Police say about that?!?
Some form of ongoing work / challenge is an important part of a good life after financial independence. If you can get paid for that (hint: you can) fantastic.
You may be worried about what colleagues / neighbours / others would say if you were to leave your professional job and do something completely different. For example, in What Should I do With My Life?, Po Bronson tells the stories of a lawyer that became a truck driver and an investment banker that became a farmer.
But what if The Retirement Police have a problem with that? Let’s ask NWA:
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