Another day in lockdown…another Now That’s What I Call Financial Independence!
They said we should be patient…
…but who knew it could go on this long??
Hopefully it’s almost over now.
Yes…The Escape Artist is back to review more classic songs about financial independence in the guise of a music critic from the NME…armed with earnest prose, psycho-babble and increasingly tenuous metaphors.
How Am I Supposed To live Without You? (Michael Bolton)
Wealth managers typically charge 2.0 – 2.5% each year of your portfolio value. On a million pound pot, that’s £25,000 a year. It’s a bit like employing a full time butler who only shows up for work one day a year.
And yet some people cling on to the familiar. Here Michael Bolton gives voice to his fears about moving his portfolio away from his wealth manager.
It’s time for Michael to man up. What exactly is stopping him from taking control, cutting his fees and manage his own portfolio using a low cost tracker fund?
Big Spender (Shirley Bassey)
Shirley is making a common mistake here. There’s a big difference between looking rich and being rich.
Most people seem to think that millionaires are people who SPEND BIG and drive expensive cars, wear expensive clothes, watches and other status symbols. Wrong!
Babylon (David Gray)
This is a love song to London. If you lived and worked in London back in the day, this might be your song. London was a boom town; an office, a casino, a shark tank, a late night bar and a playground…sometimes all in the same 24 hours. You never knew where the days and nights would take you.
London was where I worked, played, got drunk, got mugged and got back up again.
You Ain’t Much Fun (Toby Keith)
The hours in corporate finance were brutal though. I worked a lot of late nights in London.
Most of my adrenaline highs were natural (the deadlines in corporate finance were insane) but quite a few were alcohol-related.
Looking for Freedom (The Hoff)
This song was brought to my attention by The Wealthster on Twitter who pointed out that The Hoff was massive in Germany in the ‘90s, thanks to this song which happened to be released just after the Berlin Wall came down.
This does give me some cause for concern. I’m not saying The Hoff is a Nazi but we all know who else was big in Germany…
Troublemaker (Olly Murs)
It has been said that The Escape Artist never walked past a hornet’s nest without poking it with a stick. That may be an exaggeration but I do sometimes make bad taste jokes (see above) and stray onto sensitive subjects.
I try to avoid Twitter fights, internet feuds and drama queens. I don’t tell other people what they can and can’t write and I don’t let them tell me what I can’t write.
I can forgive almost anything other than people who take themselves too seriously. I don’t take myself that seriously so why would anyone else? If you can’t laugh at yourself, you’re missing out on the best joke in the universe.
The Kidz Wanna LARP (Bryan Adams)
Talking of hornets nests, sometimes I critique The Cult Of Wokery. This doesn’t win me any new friends but it does help keep the follower count down. Sometimes readers gently try to talk me out of this:
I’m afraid to tell you but wokery is here to stay. You only have to follow other FIRE groups or forums to see that the younger generation especially are calling out everyone who doesn’t follow along.
Everything has become performative, playing to an online audience who’ve outsourced their thinking to The Guardian and joined The Cult. It’s a middle class status game: showing off via luxury beliefs rather than luxury goods.
Talk is cheap. Anyone with teenage children knows the limits of wokery: everybody wants to save the world but nobody wants to help Dad with the washing up.
Watch how Bryan plays to the audience and see how the crowd lap it up. It’s like he said: the kidz wanna LARP.
Let’s Get Physical (Olivier Newton-John)
What’s the opposite of LARPing and showboating on the internet?
It’s getting a life…a real life in the real world. It’s getting outside into nature. It’s prioritising physical activity (e.g. walking, cycling, yoga, dance, weightlifting, pilates, riding) over the make believe world of social media.
It’s prioritising your real world family and friends rather than fishing for cheap likes on Fakebook or Instaglam. Better to have a handful of real friends in the real world than 10,000 followers on social media.
Put Your Records On (Corinne Bailey Rae)
As I explained in The Principles of Ethical Monetisation, creating original content is hard work and if the blogger does not get paid in some form they will soon give up (see FI blogger graveyards here and here).
You can get paid in fun or money. I keep writing the Now FI! series because it’s fun to create. Even if everyone else hates it.
You have to enjoy the journey or else you won’t stick to The Path.
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